Goodbye Left Ovary

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A week from today (Oct. 22. 2015) I will be saying goodbye to my left ovary and both fallopian tubes. I love my little ovary and I'm not fond of having to loose it. I have to admit that I'm scared shitless! I'm sure all is going to go well, but there is always that slight chance for the unexpected. The unexpected discovery that there is more going on than the benign cyst. The unexpected chance that I wake up to find that I had a full hysterectomy and that I have, should I even say it, CANCER. Even worse, for my family in particular, is the unexpected chance my untimely death for some unexpected reason. I can't say for sure that that outcome would be the worst for me because the Promise Land could be wonderful and I would be at peace.

So just I case, I feel like I need to take stock of the life I've lived so far. I have had a great life. First, I have a loving, wonderful Mother. I draw all my strength from the lessons she has taught me. I have two great and very supportive sisters. We depend on each other and are secure in the knowledge that we will always be there for each other.

I've always followed my heart and have always played it safe with practical decision making. I've had my pick of men and have found true love. Rick is my knight in shining armor. I have grown and become a better person because of him. The family that we have made together has been both challenging and rewarding. The challenge was to try and have a family at all. After six years of failed attempts, we turned to adoption and were blessed with two beautiful boys.

Adam, I couldn't be prouder of you. We have so many similarities it's as if you came from my body. You also follow your heart and the creative spirit is strong in you. You are so lucky that you have tapped into that at such a young age. May you always be lucky and create the life that will make you happy.

Benjamin, you are a shining star. Your energy is infectious and your talents are many. You make me happy when you walk in the room and the affection you give is like no other. You will be great at what ever you decide to focus on. I am very proud of you as well and couldn’t picture my life without you in it.

Overall I've lived a pretty fulfilled life. I've worked hard, played hard and loved passionately. And let's not forget the GREAT friendships I've made along the way. I have no regrets and would do it a lover again. A big thanks to all my friends and family that helped make my life so rich and filled with love. I am fulfilled…

Note: Today is Oct 30, one day after my surgery. All went well and I feel thankful and free from that pre-op anxiety. I’m grateful that it has given me the opportunity to review the life I’ve lived so far and am looking forward to the rest of it. Today is the beginning of the rest of my life :-)